Jungle
Legend Of The Bog

Legend Of The Bog

Movie
Studio(s): 
Director(s): 
On DVD: 
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Grade:
F
Running Time: 
92 minutes
Bonus Features

None, thank god

Two girls run out of gas, a taxi driver and his passenger are stranded when the taxi gets stuck in the mud, and a professor and his ex-girlfriend hit a cow in the road. What does all this mean? Well it means that they found different but equally stupid ways to strand 6 people in the middle of a bog. And of course instead of following the roads that they were on they all travel further into the bog looking for help. Then they all manage to come across the same house and meet each other. Then cut to a quick montage as they work together to get a fire going, forage for food in the wild, and bond. But all that sweet, fun, playing around ends suddenly when a hunter returns letting them know it is his cabin. Well what do we call this hunter? Mr. Hunter. The creativity in this story is astounding. Throw in a large man wearing a burlap sack grunting & stagger around who is suppose to be an old bog mummy raised from the dead and looking to kill and you have a piece of shit movie that I unfortunately had to sit through.

How bad could this movie possibly be you may ask? Well while watching it I actually took time to look up the director as I was sure it had to be Uwe Boll. Maybe it didn’t have quite the same ineptitude; but trust me it is horrible in its own right.  Bad acting, bad story, bad sets. Plus the whole 6 strangers that have all committed some horrible act in a bog manage to end up in a bog from random acts with no supernatural help just so they can be punished in a bog plot sucks. About the only decent thing is Vinnie Jones and that’s just because I love him as an actor. But don’t be fooled by the cover as it has his name only and his picture only. His part is more like an extended cameo than a starring role. 

Everything about this movie is a complete waste of time: it being made, me having to watch it, me having to write about it, and you reading about it. Cut your losses now and walk away.

Pandora
Review by Pandora
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