We’ve gotten two Transformers films from director Michael Bay thus far so it should come as no surprise that Transformers: Dark of the Moon is much of the same action, explosions, cheesy dialogue, and more explosions. Is the third time the charm for Bay or has he swung his final strike?

Things have calmed down since the last battle between Autobots and Decepticons, so much so that Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf) is having difficulty finding a job, despite the fact that he saved the world twice already. While Sam attempts to live a normal life, the Autobots still on Earth assist the humans in Black Ops missions around the world. Eventually, this leads them to discovering a secret past relating to the Space Race and the dark side of the moon. It’s a secret that will reignite the war between Autobots and Decpticons.

I’ll say it right off the bat; if you enjoy Michael Bay and the previous Transformers films, then you’re going to enjoy Dark of the Moon. It’s basically the same as before only this time around the cars are sweeter, the explosions are bigger, and Megan Fox, well, we all know what happen to her. Fox’s replacement, Victoria’s Secret model Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, is Sam’s new girlfriend and that’s about it. Her only role of the film is to be eye candy, nothing else. Bay makes this fact known with his provocative camera angles and over sexualized dialogue whenever she’s around. Basically, she’s the character Bay always wanted Fox to be.

One thing you have to give Bay credit for is that he knows how to make things go boom. The entire Chicago skyline practically gets leveled thanks in part to the Decepticons and their mission to take over the Earth. The Transformers may have fancy new car models but they also pack some big weapons as well, and no, they’re not afraid to use them. Buildings will get demolished, Transformers will be ripped to shreds, and citizens will flee in panic in this all out war between good and evil.

The majority of the cast reprises their respective roles as Autobots and Decepticons. The newest (and biggest) additions are Sentinel Prime, voiced by none other than Leonard Nimoy, and Shockwave, voiced by veteran Transformers voice actor Frank Welker. Both are welcomed additions to the franchise. In the end though, there are tons more Transformers who make their debut. The problem with this is that you don’t really care about the majority of them save for a few like Optimus, Bumblebee, etc. They try to fit so much into a movie that’s already longer than it should be.

You’d think that in two and a half hours you’d be able to tell a decent story. You’d be wrong. The story, by far, is the worst thing about Transformers: Dark of the Moon. The story is just so utterly ridiculous that you can’t take anyone seriously. It seems like everyone needs to crack a joke every now and again, despite the fact that a building is coming down right in front of your or there’s a Decepticon cannon in your face. Scenes are randomly pieced together, forcing you to make these crazy conclusions of how they came to be. Leave your brain at home for this one because that’s the only way you’ll enjoy it.

What Dark of the Moon does do well are the visuals. All the Autobots and Decepticons look amazing and some of the action sequences are quite exhilarating. Optimus Prime kicks all kinds of kinds of Decpeticon ass in the film, and I must say it was exciting to watch. There are definitely some cool slow motion scenes as well. If there’s one thing Michael Bay does well, it’s this type of stuff.

As expected, Transformers: Dark of the Moon is just another big budgeted movie with giant robots fighting for control of the world with us humans caught in the middle. Everything is over the top and larger than life. If you’re a fan of the previous films in the series or of Michael Bay in gereneral, you’ll definitely get a kick out of it. Still, I think everyone is secretly hoping that this marks the end of the Transformers series, at least for the time being.

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