>> Retribution Road (2009)

Title: Retribution Road

Genre: Western

Starring: John Castellanos, Michael Gregory

Studio: Lionsgate

Runtime: 75 minutes

Release Date: July 21, 2009

Format: DVD

Discs: 1

MPAA Rating: PG-13

Rating: 0.31 (out of 4.00)

Grade: F

Bonus Features

None

Johnny Rios is a ruthless criminal who is wanted by the law but always manages to evade them. While robbing a bank in the small town of Wardlaw he is caught and held in their jail until he can have his day in court. But Rios still manages to cause problems for the sheriff while behind bars, revealing the truth about the sheriff’s wife and daughter. If that wasn’t enough Rios father and crew are coming to bust him out. The town will have to stand together or risk being wiped out.

I have seen a lot of Westerns, both good & bad. This is one of the worst I have seen for a variety of reasons. The story is so basic, they pretty much took basic plot points that many Westerns have and that was it. There is no character development and you don’t care about anyone living or dying. Well I take that back you will probably want the two Civil War soliders that are supposed to be the comic relief I think to go. They talk in goofy voices and are suppose to be slow. One is “missing” a hand, which they accomplished this awesome special effect by pulling his sleeve down over his hand to cover it. And everyone sounds like they are reading off of cue cards. Imagine a high school drama class the first week of school being in. Or better yet anyone see the episode of “My Name Is Earl” with Seth Green when they make the “2 The Max” movie? There you go except that was supposed to be funny “Retribution Road” they are taking themselves way to seriously.

But where the acting is lacking in emotion the music more than makes up for it. You have people stumble over their lines about how the town is in trouble and then sort of an awkward pause before realizing they needed to leave the room and all of a sudden you get this epic, long musical piece. But the music only comes in when no one is talking. Which is probably a good thing since the audio most of the time sounds muffled like people are under water or there is a buzzing feedback sound.

My suggestion: Pass it’s a crappy low budget movie that will only be a waste of your time. Not even good for a laugh.

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